Friday, December 3, 2010

Heart Attack Courtesy of Emmett

I have been working on my Christmas cards and letter. I don't write out a paragraph style letter, I do bulleted highlights on a month by month basis with lots of supporting pictures. I didn't really have anything for November so I decided to write "Laurie thinks we may be past the non-stop messes and heart attacks from Emmett"

I really thought he was starting to slow down with the insanity.

Regular readers of this blog will understand what I'm talking about...

But I jinxed myself.

I wrote that Wednesday night. Then Thursday morning, while Avery and Carson were in school, Emmett and I ran some errands. After one stop, I needed to go to WalMart to check how much bigger the next size pj's were for Avery. So there I was, looking at the pj's. Emmett was on the other side of the rack inside of the cart. Wait, no, he climbed out. He took a few steps away and gave me his pure mischief smirk. He laughed a little then... ran. Full on ran. I headed after him. He took a corner down another main isle in the clothing department. I turned the corner maybe two seconds after him. He was gone. There were people just about 20 feet up the isle and a WalMart employee but I doubted Emmett would run to them and past, so I could only assume he jumped into the racks. But it's impossible to see around those! I asked the WalMart employee if a little boy had run past and she hadn't seen him. Neither of us was spotting him...

So they called a code Adam. WalMart's missing child code. Ugh. As it took longer and longer to find him, the situation rapidly stopped being embarrassing and just became incredibly frightening. Eventually he was found driving a car in the fun center... a ways across the store... by the opposite entrance that we came in... by an entrance, as in by the exit! Oh, be still my beating heart.

It seriously took about an hour for my chest to stop hurting after that. All I could do was carry him out of the store because I couldn't say or do anything for fear of falling apart.


Then, Thursday night Travis and I headed up to bed, the kids having long since been put to bed. But wait, Emmett was not in bed. Emmett was on my bathroom counter. Emmett had black liquid eyeliner and mascara on his face. I told him sternly, "oh, you stay right there!" and went to get the camera. The stern voice set him crying. Travis came then and thought he was crying because the mascara was in his eye, but I knew better.
Actually, considering how often the kids watch, or are at least with me when I'm doing my make-up, I'm surprised this hasn't happened before. Avery and Carson are old enough now to get that it's a Mommy/girl thing, but I am surprised neither of them (especially Avery) ever tried this when they were younger. Also, for how many times Emmett has ransacked toothpaste and moisturizer etc. in my bathroom, I'm surprised it took him this long to try out the make-up.

And THEN, for the third event in less than 48 hours, Friday morning the little punk dumps an 18 pack of eggs on the floor! He even had his high chair pulled over ready for reaching the top shelves. Travis found him first (and I could tell by his response that I needed to bring the camera with me), but when I came in and exclaimed, that's when Emmett fell apart crying exactly like he had the night before. If it upsets him so much that he's upset me, you'd think he'd learn...


So, apparently we haven't moved past the insanity. He's still as mischievous as ever, causing messes left and right, and giving us more heart attacks than either of his brothers ever have. And Avery's no slouch in the insane asylum...


Angela said...

The last time Ethan went missing (3wks ago) an employee found him in my van pretending to drive it. So he DID make it out of the store. Xander my #3 is also the one to get into all sorts of stuff. Food mostly which isn't good since he's diabetic. I had to get a huge gate to keep the punk in the TV room. I may even have to get a door knob cover and put it on the inside of his door to keep him in there at naptime. I'm always finding diapers every where, drawers ransacked. Our christmas tree is surrounded by a big baby gate...But I think Emmett even makes him seem tame.

Mom said...

No mascara in his eyes. Didn't slide around in the eggs. The eggs aren't sticky like juice and they don't splash all over like juice. I'm trying to think of the positives here. I'm not even going to address Wal-mart. For Christmas he is getting a square bowling ball (won't roll) with a chain attached to it and the other end of the chain attached to him. No wait. That won't work. He'll figure out something and probably get his brothers to help. There is a special place in Heaven for mothers of boys.