Sunday, February 8, 2009

Papering the Basement

Lately Avery has been rather difficult. He's been very mischievous, but not the same sort of innocent mischief like 2 years ago when a friend wrote about him as Curious George (read Here). No, I think now Avery just decides he wants to do something he knows he shouldn't and he just doesn't THINK (or in the worse cases, I think he doesn't care). One conversation with him led to him saying "My heart thinks it's funny to do naughty things." The mischief really isn't my biggest problem right now though. We're having attitude problems with a lot of negativity (and whining and huffing and stomping and growling etc.), an inability to speak nicely, and a lot of demanding rather than asking.
Enough about that.

We've begun to work on packing a little, just stuff that rarely sees use and the like, so we're not as overwhelmed with packing when it's time to get serious. Avery's really into helping with that. Somehow, he connected helping with that and this little bit of mischief yesterday. I still can't figure out how papering the basement is connected... (that's most of our Christmas wrapping paper)
Now, honestly, it's not like this was a huge deal and he didn't get in serious trouble or anything. In fact, all the examples of mischief by themselves aren't a big deal, I think I'm just frustrated and lumping all this together because there are SO MANY instances of brainlessness, or worse, indifference, and all being perpetrated by such an ornery child.


Mindy said...

As long as you don't SAY any of those things to him, you might be able to convince him that he really is a good kid.
Sometimes, when kids start throwing fits, having a hard time, seeking attention in the wrong ways, this is what we are trying: 1. OK, try over. 2. How would you say that with words instead of (behavior)? I feel upset because... It's even hard for adults to do, but you'd be giving your kids a good set of tools to communicate with later.
In our house this happens: Instead of screaming at Henry, how can you tell him? "Please Henry can you hand me that toy?" It's very interesting how polite they can sound at times. And I think Hazel is getting some good skills for kindergarten. Let me know if this helps/works.

Laurie said...

We actually do that a lot, and I think things would just be worse if we didn't. We try to have more "discussion" than yelling. After all, they can't learn much from yelling.
One of our problems is Avery calling names by saying "You ___" often he peters off, not being able to fill in the blank quickly, but sometimes he manages something nonsensical that obviously meant to be disparaging, or he's even gotten a "stupid" in there. He knows better, and I think IS trying to break that habit. Tonight was a great example where he started, but immediately stopped right after the "you" and started apologizing very courteously to Travis for it. I was super impressed. We just have to keep working with him on his self control.

morgan said...

I would totally agree that the indifference is more frustrating than the brainlessness because they DO know what they're doing. It has been 'feelings week' at Chloe's school and we're definitely trying to use our words and discuss calmly. Tiring... Smart of you to slowly start the packing process - but you're a pro at it by now, huh? lol - it never gets easy.

Mom said...

Avery, if you have a silly idea please tell Mommy about it. She wants to be silly too but safe. Let her help you be silly and safe and you can help her be silly and safe.

Then side track the busy boy with your own brand of silly.

Grammy H said...

It is so easy to get frustrated with the antics Avery pulls. Kevin(Avery's clone) put me through a lot too. I didn't always choose the best solution in helping control him though-hindsight is always better than foresight. I liked to hear other's examples that could possibly give me help as he grew up. You have a lot of friends with great ideas. I hope something will work for you. With time all things will pass!